TV Recap – AMERICAN HORROR STORY “Burn, Witch. Burn!”

I was fighting a horde of zombies myself last Thursday so I’ll begin with a brief summary of last week’s episode “Fearful Pranks Ensue” and then on to this week’s bloody good episode!

In last weeks episode we learn that in New Orleans 1961 Marie exacts justice for a friend’s son that was enrolled in an integrated high school.  A lynch mob hangs the poor boy.  As the bastard racists celebrate their exploits Marie uses a voodoo spell to raise the dead and they promptly rip the men to shreds.  In the present we are introduced to Spalding’s room where he has tea parties with his hundreds of china dolls.  Creeptacular!  Back downstairs Fiona tells him to take care of Madison’s body.  Queenie, who was attacked by the minotaur, is bleeding in the green house.  Fiona and Cordelia take her to her room.  She stops breathing and Fiona literally breathes life back into her.  LaLaurie is surprisingly grateful to her for saving her life and vows to repay her.  At Marie’s salon a package arrives, inside is the minotaur’s head, it’s eyes still blinking.  Marie declares that her peace treaty with the school is definitely over.  Zoe arrives at Kyle’s to find his mom’s head bashed in and decides to make him a snack.  While looking in the cupboards she finds tuna fish…and rat poison.  She makes a quick tuna surprise and when she goes to take it to Kyle she discovers that he is gone.

Light as a feather, stiff as a board takes on a whole new meaning for Marie.

Light as a feather, stiff as a board takes on a whole new meaning for Marie.

Cordelia has a short conversation with hubby Hank and after he hangs up he enthusiastically bangs a hot red head (Alexandra Breckenridge) who after coitus asks what he was last Halloween.  He cryptically replies, “A monster”.  I think he’s going as a monster again this year because after having breakfast with her he shoots her in the head.  Back at school the Council arrives, summoned by Nan who believes Madison is dead.  One of the Council members, Myrtle Snow, believes that Fiona is guilty of killing Madison because she was next in line for Supreme.  Cordelia comes to her mom’s rescue and says that Madison couldn’t possibly be the Supreme because she was dealing with a bad heart and Supreme’s are said to be the picture of perfect health.  We also find out that Spalding cut out his own tongue when Fiona and Myrtle were students themselves because of a truth spell that Myrtle cast.  At the salon Marie is performing an even larger spell to raise the dead to attack the school.  Fiona takes Cordelia for drinks and Cordelia gets sick and runs to the bathroom to vomit.  When she exits the stall a hooded figure emerges from the next stall and throws acid in her face.  At the school, hot neighbor Luke delivers homemade cookies for Nan.  Awww!  LaLaurie hears a pounding at the door, she opens it and surprise it is her three daughters!

Alright, on to this week’s excellent episode.  We open with a flashback to New Orleans 1833 at Madame LaLaurie’s home.  She is introducing her oldest daughter to an eligible suitor.  She taunts him into taking a trip to her ’House of Horrors’.  She tells him to stick his hand into a covered dish and guess what’s inside.  He jokes that it must have taken a long time to peel grapes.  She proudly lifts the lid and reveals…real eyeballs…from her imprisoned slaves.  He barely represses a scream and LaLaurie guides him to the next mystery dish.  He says it is a string of sausages…wrongo buddy.  She reveals human intestines and he runs screaming from the room.  LaLaurie overhears her daughters plotting to kill their evil mother and instructs her husband to get strong slaves to haul the girls to the dreaded attic.  She says she will release them in one year but she has a special surprise for the oldest daughter, on Christmas morn her mouth will be filled with shit.  Nice parenting techniques eh?

At the bar Fiona hears Cordelia screaming in pain and runs to her.  She sees a hooded figure sneak out the door.  She pulls Cordelia’s hands from her face and we see that she is horribly burned.  As Fiona waits in the emergency room she pops some pills.  A doctor comes out and says it was sulfuric acid and that although her eyeballs are intact her optic nerves were burned and she is now blind.  Back at the school Zoe leaves the meek and mild act behind and starts taking charge.  A naïve Luke thinks it’s an elaborate prank and stupidly steps outside.  He tells the motionless zombies that they’ve done a good job of scaring a house full of girls.  We see Marie levitating several feet off the ground.  Luke tells the zombies to shove off when two face painter guys arrive and marvel at the fantastic prosthetics the horde has used.  The levitating Marie opens her eyes, which are now pure white, and says, “Begin”.  The zombies attack the two guys as Luke runs for the house, but he is axed in the back.  Zoe stops Nan from running out to help him.  She then catches LaLaurie almost opening the door to her dead daughters.  She is ready for her daughter to kill her.  Zoe tells everyone to get upstairs, when she turns around she sees that Nan has disobeyed and watches as she heroically drags Luke to an unlocked car.

"You can't fool me 'zombies'.  This is just an extremely intricate prank with expensive looking prosthetics!"

“You can’t fool me ‘zombies’. This is just an extremely intricate prank with expensive looking prosthetics!”

In Cordelia’s hospital room Fiona is ready to pop more pills and finds that she is out.  She saunters down the halls to the medicine room and spells her way in.  She goes shopping and pops more pills and washes them down with whatever she has in her flask.  When she leaves the room she tries desperately to stay upright and walk back down the hall.  Her limited attention is drawn to a screaming woman’s room…just inside the door there is a dead baby in a carrier.  Fiona asks the distraught woman if the baby was stillborn or if it died after childbirth.  Stillborn.  The mother asks if the baby is a boy or a girl.  Girl.  Fiona picks up the baby and tells the mother to hold her and talk to her.  She feeds her lines, including, “I will be your mother until the day you die.”  Fiona then puts her hand on the infant’s head and the baby comes to life.

As the zombies destroy the car that Nan and Luke are in Zoe distracts them and they chase after her, forcing her into a shed.  LaLaurie tells Queenie to stay in bed while she goes to the kitchen to get some ice for her.  She hears noises outside and sees her oldest daughter in the window.  She opens the door and tries to talk sweetly and tells her to come back to her.  The daughter grabs her mother’s throat and lifts her off the ground.  Zoe is searching for a way out when she sees something off camera.  Queenie tells Spalding to check on LaLaurie and he is attacked by her daughter who then goes after Queenie.  She is backed into a corner so the human voodoo doll stabs herself and slits her throat, but to no avail.  LaLaurie saves Queenie by impaling her daughter from behind with a fireplace poker.

Nan desperately tries to get Luke back to the house but the zombies notice and are ready to pounce again.  Luke falls to the ground, mere feet from the front door and he apologizes to Nan.  Then my favorite part of this episode happens.  We hear the roar of a chainsaw and see Zoe in full Ash mode.  She begins shredding through the cadavers like butter.  With her face a blood spattered mess she thinks her task is done, but no sir, there is one rather large deadite to take care of.  The only problem is her trusty chainsaw won’t start up again.  She trips and falls backwards and we see Zoe use a new power.  She tells the corpse to “Be of your nature” and he, and Marie, fall to the ground.  Marie says, “I don’t know what that was but they got some real power in that witch house now.”  So Zoe appears to be a necromancer of sorts.

In Cordelia’s room her hubby Hank finally arrives and immediately starts fighting with Fiona.  A nurse barges in and says that one of them must leave.  Fiona tells him he has fifteen minutes and when she comes back he will disappear…he can go alone or go her way…and she says she prefers the latter option.  Hank talks to his wife and grabs her hand.  Cordelia opens her blind eyes and sees in her mind’s eye Hank having the affair and she yanks her hand away from his.  Apparently Cordelia has lost one sense and gained another, possibly more powerful form of sight.

The next morning Fiona is back at school and Nan and Zoe are throwing body parts into a bonfire.  Fiona tells Zoe that she likes a witch that knows how to fight and she won’t forget it.  The council shows up to witness the backyard pyre and once again bring Fiona to the great room for her trial of sorts.  They decree that Fiona must leave immediately and Fiona accuses Myrtle of being guilty of blinding her daughter.  She grabs Myrtle’s gloved hand and claims that she was in town when Madison went missing and was staying in a nearby motel under an assumed name.  We see that in her motel room there are dozens of pictures of Fiona with several symbols drawn on her visage in what appears to be lipstick.  Myrtle blurts out that Fiona must be stopped and Fiona pulls the gorgeous red leather glove off her hand to reveal an acid burn mark.  The other two Council members take a vote and say to burn the witch.  Strangely Myrtle says she won’t resist and she will go proudly to the flame.

Then the Council, Queenie, Zoe, Nan, Fiona and the albino guards lead Myrtle to the stake in an abandoned rock quarry.  Zoe asks if this is a joke and Queenie says that you don’t mess with the Supreme.  Damn straight.  The guards dump gasoline on her, flattening her trademark frizzy red hair.  Fiona asks if she has any last words and Myrtle says, “You are all a bunch of little toads in a pot that Fiona is slowly bringing to a boil.  I’d rather burn than boil.”  Fiona flicks her cigarette and Myrtle bursts into flames.  There is a beautiful shot of the burning Myrtle reflected in Zoe’s huge eyes.

"You know these bad ass outfits and hats almost make up for the post traumatic stress that we will surely endure."

“You know these bad ass outfits and hats almost make up for the post traumatic stress that we will surely endure.”

After the fire Queenie goes to Fiona’s room with a question.  Did she help Fiona frame a guilty person or an innocent one?  We see a minor flashback to Fiona’s trial when she accuses Myrtle and see Queenie in the hallway outside dipping her hand into acid.  Queenie says she cannot live with this guilt but the silver tongued Fiona tells her that she senses Queenie getting stronger and that she might be the next Supreme.  She further strokes her ego and says that the coven needs a woman of color as the next Supreme.  To my surprise the usually spunky Queenie falls for these lines with stars in her eyes.  We cut to Spalding in his creepy doll room Lysoling the hell out of it.  He opens a trunk with Madison inside.  As he tries to lift her out one of her arms rips off.  Ewww.  In the closing scene we see Misty Day walking towards Myrtle’s charred body.  She places her hands on her charred head and Myrtle’s eyes suddenly pop open.

So what do you think friendos?  Was Myrtle really guilty of anything?  Did she summon Misty before she died knowing that she would be able to bring her back?  All I know for certain is it was so awesome to see an assertive Zoe kicking zombie ass!  Thanks for reading and I can’t wait to find out what happens next!

Like what you see? Be sure to also visit Pissed Off Geek too for more news and reviews with a horrific edge. To stay up to date with the latest horror news and reviews from the site be sure to "like" Truly Disturbings's Facebook page and following us on Twitter!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *