Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus right down Briarcliff Lane!  Read on for a recap of last week’s episode and my review of Unholy Night!

Tonight we took a wild ride on Satan…I mean Santa’s slay…get it?  Two puns for the price of one!  Let’s reacquaint ourselves with last week’s show first.  In the episode “Dark Cousin” we learned quite a few mind-blowing things.  We found Grace being “saved” by Dr. Arden only to give her life to save Kit who escaped the jail and had come back to Briarcliff to save her.  Ironic isn’t it?  We found out how great Sister Mary Eunice’s supernatural powers are when she threw Dr. Arden across the room with telekinetic power.  A young African American man summons the angel of death after running his wrists through a meat cutter.    She looked like she stepped out of a 1940’s film noir and her raven black wings expand when she “releases” someone from their human existence.  The dark angel is Season 1 veteran Frances Conroy.

The angel of death and Sister Mary confront each other.  Mary says that the angel has done what she needs to do and must leave.  The angel tells her “cousin” that “The human girl you’ve taken hostage sings to me.  For a brief moment we see the real Mary come forward and plead to be saved, but is quickly pushed back by the demon that possesses her.  The dark angel makes several more appearances offering to help several characters, including Lana who is being raped by Bloody Face.  She tells the angel that death would be better but she’s not ready yet.  After a brief reprieve BF comes back down to the dungeon and apologizes for his actions.  He wants to put Lana out of her misery and will do so as humanly as possible, even giving her a sedative before either slitting her throat or strangling her.  As he straddles Lana, syringe in hand, Lana smashes him over the head with a framed picture of her dead lover Wendy.  She grabs the syringe, doses the Doc and throttles him with her chains.  She gains enough time to grab the key to her shackles and release herself.  As she runs blindly into the road she is almost run down by a woman-hating man.  To make a long story short…too late…the man pulls a gun and shoots…not Lana but himself.  When Lana comes to she’s come full circle and is back at Briarcliff.

On the Sister Jude front, after receiving a call from Sister Mary in the dead Nazi hunter’s hotel room, she winds up in a diner bathroom and imagines herself slicing her wrists with a straight razor that Mary thoughtfully left for her.  When she goes out she sees the Dark Angel sitting in a booth.  The angel offers to ease her pain…and I wonder…is this “angel” really good or is she doing this for nefarious reasons?  As Lana did before her Jude also declines her offer.  She has one more thing to do.  Jude travels to the home of the parents of the girl she ran down with her car.  She’s sweating bullets as she is about to make her confession when a young woman walks through the door.  It is Missy, Jude’s supposed victim.  She is alive and well after an accident that left her with only a few broken bones.  What a revelation!  Years of hiding out and being guilt ridden are lifted from Jude.    I’m rooting for Jude more than ever now!

He sees you when you’re sleeping and he knows when you’re awake…he knows if you’ve been bad or good…but he’ll slay you anyway…

Now for this week’s review of “Unholy Night”.  I don’t know what this says about me but I laughed a lot during this episode.  It all began with Hell’s version of How the Grinch Stole Christmas.  A marvelous Ian McShane first makes his cameo by shooting a store front Santa and donning his blood spattered suit.  He sneaks into a home and a precocious little girl catches him.  We find out some disturbing things about this Santa and they are not very jolly.  During the episode Sister Mary opens the cell that Sister Jude had closed a year earlier, and hoped to keep it that way.  Mary gives him some presents in the hopes that he would create some merry mischief.  During Santa’s release poor security guard Frank is praying over the body of Grace.  He tells Dr. Arden he wants to call the cops, no matter what the consequences to him, or anyone else.  Sister Jude is back with a vengeance and is snuck back into Briarcliff by an unlikely ally.  Jude gets a taste of her own medicine, cane flavor, from someone.  That’s all I’ll say.  Lana meets an old acquaintance back at the asylum and Dr. Arden sees something he would never imagine as he goes to dispose of Grace’s body.  When watching the episode pay close attention to the new “ornaments” Sister Jude hangs on the tree.  They are hellarious and evil at the same time.  Please let me know what you thought of this episode, especially Ian McShane’s turn as Satan Claws!  Thanks for reading friendos!

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